Yesterday while waiting for my sister to exit the Sephora in our local mall, I decided to check some e-mails. I was sitting there bored with other fellow mall hostages. My day got better after one of the Mogul representatives informed me that I’m now a Mogul Influencer! *insert corny smile here* As soon as I read this, I felt such an urgency to brag.
I had such an urge to stand up on that very sofa I was sinking into. It had to be done. My ego, and the little girl in her stroller drove me into this reckless mindset. I saw her mom on the phone near the escalators, so she clearly wasn’t alone. While she waited for mommy dearest, she kept taunting me with her red velvet ice cream. Blatantly showing me her virile metabolism was no match for mine -bitch. I wanted to get her back, and this was my moment to do so. I also wanted to spread my happiness. Especially to the irritated gentlemen on my left. I didn’t do anything to him, let me just say.
Carl (he) was annoyed because his wife Sandra (I believe) finished explaining that she not only had her pedicure appointment but a manicure as well. Finalizing his dreaded reality; he was going to have to stick around for another three hours on that couch beside me, and maybe miss the soccer game against Ecuador versus the USA. Sorry Carl.
Still, I basked in my glory.
I didn’t stand on that couch, I don’t think. I stood beside it. Super proud, I took in a deep breath. And do you know what it smelled like? Victory you guys, victory. I was so enchanted by this glory, the rest is somewhat of a blur.
Now, from what my sister Keeks (twenty years old) told me on the bus ride home, my recollection of these events wasn’t coinciding with hers. It seems I became a little too engulfed in my achievement. I’m twenty-seven by the way. Not that it matters…really…
Shortly after Keeks exited Sephora, from what the security guard told her; I did, in fact, stand up on the sofa with my dirty Sketchers Shape-ups (the fat weighted sneakers to tone your butt, a review soon to come). Followed by me putting my hands on my waist, laughing in a very ominous tone, then jumped off and headed for the little bi- eh girl. I snatched the little girl’s ice cream, gave it a few swift licks, then smashed it into the ground like a football star scoring a touchdown. Keeks also said that I screamed into the little girl’s her face “Fight me you little bitch!” She cried. I ran in the opposite direction. And the security guard stopped me before making a clean exit.https://giphy.com/embed/yD6r12NmIV02c
But that’s neither here nor there you guys. Even after the security guard telling my younger sister to control me, and that little girl’s mother threatening me… I still walked away a success. I still had my dignity like the cover image of my post. *See cover image* Mary-Katherine-Gallagher. Like a Superstar. Which by the way is one of my favorite 90’s movies of all time. It won’t disappoint. Trust me.
At the heart of things, I’m very excited to continue to post on Mogul and get to know it’s members. Just a small tidbit I had to share with everyone. I hope everyone’s weekend/week is amazing and gets even better (truthfully I don’t know what continent you’re in, but none the less you get me.. you do). Can I get an amen? Perhaps maybe an ice cream? Preferably one that doesn’t belong to a little girl with a very tough mother from Harlem? Oh, and I’m also banned from my local mall, but it was worth it. – Cool. See you back here soon!